Adapt or Lay Awake at Night

You have to be able to adapt.

Sometimes things don’t go as planned.  In fact, usually they don’t.  Are you the kind of person that gets uptight if your ducks don’t walk in row?  Because it seems like, in youth ministry (at least in my youth ministry) the ducks never walk in the row to which they have been assigned.

One thing I have learned as a tried and true principle in my ministry –write it all in pencil…and make sure you have a good eraser.

This year, we decided to do something we’ve never done before.  We actually took our students tent camping for one night of our summer camp experience.  I hear your incredulity – ‘you’ve never been camping?!’ – ‘is there any other kind of camping besides tent camping?!’ – ‘why only one night of camping – are you a pansy?!’

Yes – yes to all!!  I’ve never taken teenagers camping.  There are LOTS of other types of camping that do not include sleeping on rocks and pooping in holes.  And, yes, thanks for noticing – I am definitely a pansy.  My idea of roughing it is running out of towels at the Holiday Inn!  But, alas, because I love my students and they begged me – we decided to give them ONE night of tent camping to start off our summer camp experience.

At about 2 AM, Mountain Time, I realized I would have to adapt to survive the evening.

I don’t know if you know this about me – but I am what most grandmothers call ‘husky.’  Most teenagers call it fat.  I call it preparation for being lost in the wilderness after tent camping.

I don’t know if you know this, either.  Most sleeping bags are not made for ‘husky’ guys.  I was trying to sleep on a self-inflatable pad (that didn’t have very good self-esteem apparently) in a sleeping bag that was a size and a half too small for a husky guy.  I would dose for about ten minutes and then awake as some part of me either fell off the pad onto the hardened ground or slipped out of my straight-jacket called a sleeping bag.

Finally – in the middle of the night and to the symphonic sounds of coyote calls – I finally decided I needed to adapt if I was to sleep a wink.

I unzipped my sleeping bag so it was the biggest comforter I’d ever seen (yes, even big enough for a husky guy), positioned my self on my flate-less inflatable mat in the most comfortable position I could muster – and slept deeply and soundly until morning.

Now what’s the point of all the TMI?  There are times in ministry when things just don’t go as planned.  Someone throws a monkey-wrench in the carefully-thought-out mix of your ministry ideal.  Equipment doesn’t work to its potential or for its intended use.  You step WAY outside your comfort zone only to find it’s VERY uncomfortable there.

You can spend the entire night resisting adaptation – trying to force square pegs into round holes (husky guys into slender bags).  Or you can simply adapt.  You can adjust to the circumstance.  You can show your students how to make the best of a bad situation.  You can get a good, deep sleep in the midst of coyotes.

Youth ministry, of all professions, is about adaptation.  We adapt to trends.  We adapt to everyone else’s calendar.  We adapt our eating habits, sleeping styles, and musical tastes – all in an effort to love God by loving students.

So the next time things go awry in your ministry – your mattress doesn’t inflate, your sleeping bag is too small, or the coyotes are singing the wrong song – remember…you can adapt.  You can sleep well.  You can find Jesus EVEN in the midst of tent camping.

Darren is a veteran youth pastor in Corpus Christi, TX, and the co-host of Mi Podcast – a weekly podcast for parents of teenagers. (www.facebook.com/MiPodcast)

Do You Know Where Your Kids Are Swimming?

By far, one of the highlights of our Colorado adventure trip was a morning at the natural hot springs.  I didn’t have to hang off a hundred-foot cliff by a tiny rope.  I didn’t have to walk 40 miles, up hill, both ways, in thin mountain air.  No one was falling into the icy river as we navigated rapids designed for Olympians.  Nothing but a natural hot tub…now that’s my idea of adventure.

The hot springs were divided into three pools.  One was a tepid, playing pool.  Kids were playing volleyball, chicken fighting (don’t tell the lifeguards), and swimming laps in that pool.  It was cool upon entering, but one could swiftly adapt….like most pools on a warm summer’s day.

One pool was about the temperature of a traditional hot tub.  But it was huge.  So it was kind of like being in a pretty hot bath with 113 of your closest friends.  It was more of a therapy pool – no playing, just relaxing.

Then there was the final pool – a crescent shaped pool with lots of warning signs about the heat.  And rightly so!  I’m not sure, but I think this pool might have actually been the first model for the Lake of Fire.

So of course, our teenagers were trying to man up and just jump in the crescent pool and stay in.  Few of them could.  It was just way too hot.

I noticed, though, that a few of them would get in and just muscle through the obvious burn.  They would sweat.  Their skin turned red (probably a rise in blood pressure).  Even though they knew it was hotter than a really hot place, they wanted to be in that pool.

I found a fascinating distinction between that pool and the others.  In the other pools, it was them temperature of the water that seemed to change.  Realistically, that didn’t happen.  Bodies just acclimate to the temperature of the pools.  But it seemed as though the cool water pool got warmer – and the traditional hot-tub water got cooler.  Kids were able to stay in both pools for prolonged periods without danger or threat as their bodies became accustomed to the water temperatures.

But in the SUPER HOT tub – the water temperature didn’t seem to change.  The water didn’t get cooler – people just got hotter….and hotter….and hotter.  And even though they were burning up – even undergoing physiological changes – they refused to get out of the pool.

It was a perfect microcosm of our student community.

We had kids who wouldn’t go anywhere near that pool.  It was too hot.  Period.  They didn’t need to try it out.  They already knew – just stay away.

We had kids who knew it was hot, but just wanted to give it a try.  And as soon as they jumped in, they jumped right back out.  Too hot.  They tried it once.  Maybe to say they had tried it.  Maybe out of curiosity.  But it didn’t take long in the pool to help them realize they just weren’t cut out for that kind of heat.

And then there were those few kids who just dived head-long into the cauldron.  Smiling as their blood pressure rose – the sweat beaded up on their foreheads – scoffing as friends tried to get them to come out of the pool.

Left in that pool long enough – according to the warning signs – people develop nausea, dizziness, even the possibility of stroke.  Being in that pool for prolonged periods of time is life threatening.

Incidentally – there was only a small, concrete wall separating the hot tub from the hotter-than-hell tub.  Wouldn’t take much for kids to jump from normal hot to life-threatening hot.

Do you know which pool your kids are swimming in?